I Wish

Warm greetings people. I hope you all are keeping safe and are taking the necessary precautions required to fight through the current situation. I wish you all nothing but love and strength. 

Today, I share with you a personal poem. You know, sometimes as a writer, you can write about fictional stories and look around for inspiration, but sometimes you have to wake up and look inside of you to find inspiration. Also, I don't pay heed to what someone has to say about this poem simply because once you are out of my life you and your opinion of me and my work don't matter anymore. 

And now, you may go ahead and read this poem. 

'I Wish'

I wish I hadn't known you
and I hadn't seen through you
'cause then just maybe I would have saved
myself from all the hurt.

Rolling on the floor
laughing out loud
with tears streaming down my cheeks
while I read everything you wrote about me.

Your long paragraphs seemed endless,
and your lies seemed reckless.
Your devious fingers running through your keyboard
with that smirk on your face.

I wish I hadn't met you the day I did,
I wish I hadn't shown you all of my hiding spots
cause all you ever did was make me feel
ashamed of my heart.

Said I would dig a grave for you
but all I did was dig a grave for myself.
I set myself up for the rage 'cause
I handed over all my weapons to you.

You said you write about muses
but all you do is give excuses
for all your abuses you have ever
stained me with.

I wish I hadn't known you
and I hadn't seen through you
'cause then just maybe I would have saved
myself from all the hurt.

I live each day deep inside the ocean,
holding my breath
'cause I know you are near
and I know you want me dead.

Your words are like graffiti
painted on the four walls of my sanity.
Your hands painted a picture of me
on all the streets I once visited.

Wish I hadn't known you with all your depth
'cause then I wouldn't have noticed
all your poison hiding beneath
all your sweet words.

12 months since
the dust came into my room
and left like a storm
with all of my belongings disarrayed.

Wish I hadn't turned by back to you and
I wish I hadn't held a mirror against you.
'Cause then,
I wouldn't have cursed myself to this day.

I wish I hadn't known you
and I hadn't seen through you
'cause then just maybe I would have saved
myself from all the hurt.

-The Loquacious Writes