How does social media affect our mental health?
Since a very
long time, I wanted to write about this issue- "Social Media & Mental
Health" or shall we say Social Media vs Mental Health? Let's find out what
shall we call it, through this blog.
The motive of writing this blog is to analyse the relationship between social
media and mental health. Is it a toxic relationship? Or Is it a fruitful relationship?
We'll conclude that at the end. To begin with, I would like to discuss this
blog with the help of some pointers.
1. Mental Health as
Attention Seeking.
When someone talks about their fractures and broken legs, people don't tweet or
say- "Oh, that person wants attention. Their legs aren't really
broken." But when a person talks about how bad their anxiety has been or
how they have been struggling with their mental health, the first thing people
say is "Oh they want attention." Why? Why do people not take mental health
as seriously as they do physical health?
Yes, there are people who want a tiny bit of attention to sustain. Because
frankly, attention is like oxygen for them. But who are you to judge which
one's seeking attention and which one's not? Why do you need proofs from people
who say they are struggling? Believe them. Social Media is a toxic and a useful
place, it depends on how you use it. You can talk, normalise and give strength
to people or you can talk and break their trust so they don't trust the other
person who brings up mental health issues to the table. The choice is yours. Talking
about mental well being on SM is important because we want change, we want to
break the stigma, we want people to speak out and not suffer alone.
2. Social Media Trials.
I am legit done with this. It's so infuriating to see people being
cancelled/abused/harassed on social media for absolutely no reason. But, if
someone doesn't know what a social media trial is, I'll help you with an
example. Back in 2016, Taylor Swift, an American singer-songwriter, got
cancelled on social media because of an edited phone call. What followed was
months of social media trolling and jokes cracked by famous celebrities. This
forced Taylor Swift to go incognito on social media for a while, and that's
when she came back with her iconic album- Reputation.
That's what a SM trial is. Most of the time people are cancelled because of an
edited chat screenshot, a twisted narrative formed by someone who wants to save
their name and wants to be a saint, an edited phone call or an edited photo. It
can be anything. And that indeed affects the mental health of the individual
who is being accused for no reason.
During this time, when you are being accused of something you did not do, you
talk about your mental health. People bring in the narrative of you being an
attention and sympathy seeker. Which is pathetic to think about. Imagine this,
you make a fake narrative out of a situation, then you tell it to literally everyone
you have met on SM just to make someone else look bad and when the person
complains about it and how it’s affecting them. YOU tell that person- "oh,
you are just seeking attention." Well. Makes talking about MH more
traumatic, no?
3. Quotes
Social media has tons of quotes. Tons of quotes that might fuel you to do
better, might help you to feel less alone and might help someone else to feel
good. But What do we use it as? To instigate others, to use them as revenge and
weapons. Which is just so immature at so many different levels. You are given a
social media handle, innumerable posts and you use them to
instigate/provoke/harass someone? Says a lot about you as a person. That puts
you in a bad light when someone’s making you the topic of every quote they post
and this also make you question a lot many things which can put you in a spiral
of self hate and sometimes even anxiety.
You may
think I am over exaggerating things. But the truth is, many people have lost
their lives because of how social media affected them. I am only helping out
and putting straight up facts.
4. Bullying.
TW: I'll talk about it because I own my experience. I have legit proofs and a
legit true narrative. I also have the courage to post my social media story
archives from the time I was being harassed. Hence, I'll talk. No one can and
will stop me. If you feel triggered by the truth, you can LEAVE.
Social media is used for bullying and harassing young and vulnerable women and
children. There are teenagers who might leak a person's intimate photographs or
sometimes not so intimate photographs without the other person's consent only
to mock them and put a risk to their mental well being. Celebrities (mostly
women) being trolled for putting on too much weight or for losing a lot of
weight (this is rare). A woman/man/trans person who shows up and talks about
how they were sexually assaulted draws a lot of abuses and harassment from
people who don't even know them and what they have been through. People who
show support to SA survivors are equally dragged and harassed. People who stand
up against the bullies are harassed and abused for simply showing their spine. Social
media puts a restriction for a vulnerable self expression because there are
people of all kinds with the choices of all kinds and some find too entitled
with their choices and stories that they can’t help it but abuse the other one
who do not conform to their definition of “normal.”
And hence your mental health, after you are bullied/harassed/gaslight by the
abusers/bullies and their enablers, goes down the drain. Speaking from personal
experience.
5. Enablers of Harassment.
These people are just so stupid to be honest. Social media gives you a platform
and an audience to use it to make an impact. But some people use to enable
abuse by supporting the bullies and sometimes the rapists. I'll also talk about
how roasting impacts people and their mental health here. Roasting can be done
in a healthy way, but if it's done to criticise someone for their gender,
sexuality, colour, caste or religion or if it includes body shaming then I
think it makes it pretty uncool. Personally, if someone would roast me in an
unhealthy way I would not enjoy it. So I won't even advice people to take it in
a healthy way and enjoy it.
Also, the moment you hold these "roasters" accountable the people who
"support" and "love" them show up in your messages, asking
you to shut the hell up. And in not a very polite way. Those people who show
support to these things even while knowing that it's wrong are the enablers of harassment
and abuse.
Same example, A bully twists the narrative and lies about the situation that
they have/had started. The victim is supposed to be the scapegoat for legit
everything that the bully did. The people who would support the bully even
after knowing what the bully is up to, are the enablers. It's as simple as
that.
6. Toxic Positivity
People who preach, “Be positive” “Don’t be sad” “Oh you struggle
with body image issues? Love yourself. Simple”, are a whole different kind of a
breed. Toxic positivity is when you tell people to stay positive no matter
what, which is NOT practical. How can someone be positive at the time when they
have lost a loved one or they have met a deadly accident? Let people grieve,
let people feel sad, anxious and angry. It’s humanly to be able to feel emotions,
to struggle and not make sense sometimes. “Love yourself” is thrown so casually
on social media that it makes me throw up. YOU are privilege to never feel pathetic
about your face or your body. For YOU, self love was easy. But for many, it is
not easy. It takes terrible days and nights to accept themselves for as they
are. People abandoned them for being who they are, so your “love yourself”
feels foreign and a distant town to them. Please talk about real MH issues
rather than just forcing people to be positive or love themselves. It’s neither
easy nor practical.
I hope I am bringing into perspective how social media can be a nasty place.
So, does this mean we should
stop using social media?
Not at all. Use it but only in the hope of doing better and good. Don't use it
to abuse or enable abuse. But also, use it at your own risk. It's a frustrating
place to be and it also has the potential to be proved to be a better place in
times of need. It would help us make it a lot more kinder only if we start to
see people for who they are rather than assuming who they are or who they
should be. You need to be able to take a stand and raise your voice against the
wrong (make sure to verify it too) every time.
Does this also mean that we
should not talk about mental health on social media?
Nope. It only means to talk more and more. There are bad people in the world
too, does that mean you stop showing up/ going out in the world? No, right? We
have to own our mistakes and talk about mental health, be more vulnerable about
it and break free from the stereotypical thinking process of "attention
seeking." It's not easy as a person to do it, but It's easy to do it as a
community. Spread love not hate. Make things easier and comfortable for the
ones who are vulnerable. That's all I ask for, through this blog.
So, for now, with respect to the current situation of social media. It is
definitely Social Media Vs Mental Health.
The
relationship between social media and mental health, is it a toxic
relationship? Or is it a fruitful relationship?
For what I have talked about in the blog, it's definitely a toxic relationship.
But we can cut down on this toxicity only by adding more love and empathy. I am
hopeful for the fact that it can be a fruitful one, in no time.
Thank you for reading!
Take care and be kind.
xx,
SFSP
Comments